Author: Eirene

Blessed Mid-Autumn Festival!

Today is Mid-Autumn Festival. As we marvel at the flourscent moon, and enjoying time with our family and friends, let us also remember to praise the Creator God. In His infinite wisdom, God creates all things visible and invisible.

“For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things were created through him and for him.” (Colossians 1:16, ESV)

He ordains time and seasons.

“For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven.” (Ecclesiastes 3:1, ESV)

To God be praised!

When Trust Seems Fragile

“Those who know your name trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.” — Psalm 9:10 (NIV)

The older we get, the more we seem to recognise that trust is a fragile thing. We’ve all experienced disappointments — promises not kept, friends letting us down, plans falling through, and words that don’t match actions.

But Psalm 9:10 gives us a different perspective. It points us to the One whom we can put our trust — not people, not possessions, not circumstances, but God.

To “know His name” is not just to have head knowledge that He is “God.” In biblical terms, to know someone’s name means to know their character. It implies that we’ve been journeying with someone long enough to truly understand who they are. It is a deep and intimate friendship, built over time and through experience, both joyful and painful moments.

Time and time again, God’s friends have found Him to be a solid anchor in this fragile world. His perfect character does not change. He can be trusted, because He has proven, again and again, that He will never forsake those who seek Him. Those who know God have tasted His faithfulness, goodness, love, and mercy. Because of these experiences, we can trust Him despite wherever circumstances we are in.

God can be trusted because his character doesn’t change. He doesn’t waver with the seasons of life. He doesn’t disappear when things get hard. He is there for us not when we are strong, but He is there especially when we are helpless, hopeless, and weak.

Which area of your life is God inviting you to trust Him in today?

The Beauty of Christian Literature

John Wesley once said in a sermon:

“Give me that Book! At any price, give me the Book of God! I have it: here is knowledge enough for me. Let me be homo unius libri (a man of one book).”

The Book he was referring to is the Bible.
John Wesley believed that the Bible is the final authority from God for faith and practice. It is the Book we use as the standard for daily living. We follow the teachings of the Bible.

God’s Word lights our path and guides us in holy living, in service, and in love for one another.

However, for many of us, the Bible is not always easy to understand. We need people to teach us God’s Word so that we can grow in our faith and in our walk with God.

Apart from the Bible, God also uses Christian literature—spiritual songs, hymns, books, devotionals, and sermons—to speak to us.
We give thanks for the many Christian writers, poets, hymn and songwriters, journalists, and scholars—both past and present—who have been nourished by God’s Word and have taken the time to help others see it more clearly. They are God’s mouthpieces to us as we navigate through life.
God uses them to speak to us and inspire us in our Christian journey.

There are times when physical mentors are not available to us, but we can still learn from their wisdom through their literary works.

📘 To Know God More Deeply

Books written by faithful Christian writers and theologians offer rich insights into God’s Word and His character.

When I was younger, I found Philip Yancey’s books especially impactful—titles such as Disappointment with God, Where Is God When It Hurts?, The Jesus I Never Knew, and Prayer helped me see different facets of God.
Philip Yancey is one of the authors who inspired me to love Jesus more and to understand His heart.

Christian writers help us discern right from wrong. They guide us toward sound theology and deeper understanding.

🔥 To Ignite Our Passion for Living

There is a wide selection of Christian books available today. Reading them helps us understand our purpose here on earth.

John Piper once said:

“The reason for reading Christian books is not just to be smarter, but to be more in love with Christ and more useful to His people.”

Mother Teresa’s journal entries have also been an encouragement to me. In her journals, she wrote about experiencing spiritual darkness—even as she ministered to the dying and the sick in Calcutta.
She described a deep pain that tormented her soul from the beginning of her mission with the poor.

Although she felt as if God wasn’t near, she knew she was a “child of His love.”
She wrote:

“I want to smile even at Jesus and so hide, if possible, the pain and the darkness of my soul even from Him.”
She also said:
“If I ever become a Saint—I will surely be one of ‘darkness.’ I will continually be absent from Heaven—to light the light of those in darkness on earth.”

What beautiful writing, and what strong faith! Even in spiritual darkness, she held on to Jesus, knowing she was called to bring light to those in darkness.

👥 To Be Mentored by Godly Men and Women

Through books, we can access the minds of godly men and women from today—and from hundreds of years ago.

In today’s fast-moving world, each of us has limited time to meet in person. It’s rare to sit down with a mentor to ask questions or learn deeply from them.
Even though I have accessible lecturers who are just a text away, reading books allows for deeper, longer reflection on important topics—far beyond surface-level conversations.

John Piper said:

“Reading gives us access to centuries of godly wisdom. Not reading is cutting ourselves off from the communion of the saints.”

Books give us the opportunity to glean wisdom from different cultures, time periods, and perspectives.
We live in a modern world with easy access to books and resources—what a gift!

💍 Learning Through Christian Books on Marriage

How did I learn about marriage?
I’m not married, but I have preached at weddings and conducted pre-marital counselling.

I’ve learned from my parents, of course—but another key source has been Christian books on marriage by authors like Paul Tripp, the late Timothy Keller, and others.
These writers explain biblical teachings on marriage and offer practical steps for daily life with a spouse.

95% of my friends are married. Some of them often complain about being married. That’s why I turn to Christian writers for wisdom, so my views on marriage are not distorted by negative opinions.

These books have taught me how to treat a spouse with love and respect, rather than just complain about one another.

When we read books, we are mentored by wise and godly people, shaped by their experiences with God.

👨‍🍳 Brother Lawrence and the Presence of God

I once read The Practice of the Presence of God by Brother Lawrence.
He encouraged his suffering friends by saying:

“How sweet it is to suffer with God. Great though the sufferings may be.”

Brother Lawrence was a cook, and he spoke to Jesus as if Jesus were physically present with him in the kitchen.
His simplicity and devotion are inspiring.

🌱 To Nourish Our Soul

Just as we need food for our physical bodies, we need nourishment for our souls.
We do that, in part, by reading Christian books.

Just like our bodies need a variety of nutrients, our minds and spirits benefit from reading books from different genres and perspectives.
This helps us grow in our worldview, deepen our understanding of God, and appreciate the beauty of other human beings.

📖 Christian Literature and the Bible

The Bible can never be replaced.

We cannot simply read spiritual books and neglect God’s Word.
Christian literature does not replace the Bible. Instead, it points us to it, explains it, and offers us practical application.

Christian literature is like stained glass—it helps us see the light of Scripture in color.

Reading spiritual materials nourishes our soul and transforms us from the inside out.

Bringing Light to Others

Mother Teresa once said she wanted to bring light to those in darkness.
Through Christian literature, we too can bring light to others.

Think of the influence of:

  • John Wesley’s sermons and journals
  • Charles Wesley’s hymns, which still minister to us today
  • Testimonies, letters, and devotionals written by everyday believers

God’s Word is a lamp, and we are the lamp-bearers.
Many people in the society are lost, confused, sad, anxious, and hurting.
Are we called to carry the light of the Gospel—through word and deed?
Yes, we are. Let us bring God’s Word of hope and love to them. It will be like a light that surrounds them.

Your story, your insight, your testimony may be the light someone else needs.

So share what God has done in your life.
Pass on good books that help you during your difficult moments.
Recommend Christ-centered resources to your friends.

Don’t hide the light but be a blessing to others through the blessing you have received.

Conclusion

Life is not always easy. We go through ups and downs. There are mountaintop moments where everything seems smooth and we enjoy success and fruitfulness. But there are also seasons when we feel discouraged and disheartened—walking through valleys, feeling spiritually dry, and wondering if God is far away.

But take heart—we are not alone.
We are not walking in darkness.

God is with us.
His Word is a lamp to our path and a light to our feet.

Let us delight in knowing more about God—not only through the Bible, but also through faithful, Christ-centered Christian literature.
Let us read about Him.
Let us grow in Him.
And let us bring His light to the world.

God’s Word: A Lamp for our Feet and A Light to our Path

Have you ever walked in such dark places that you couldn’t go too far because it was too dark to see the step ahead of you?
Every step had to be taken carefully because we couldn’t see far in front of us.

I remember years ago, when we went to the longhouses at night for services, there were no streetlights. The stretch of road was long and dark. It was also rocky, with pebbles and stones of various sizes. The road was uneven, with holes in certain parts.

That was before we had torchlights in our handphones. We would move in a group and had to stay close to one another because the person in front of us was carrying a torchlight. If we lagged too far behind, we wouldn’t have enough light to see what was ahead.
We needed light so we wouldn’t stumble and fall, and to avoid unnecessary injuries in the dark.
We needed light to illuminate our path.

“Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.”
(Psalm 119:105)

We are all on this journey called life. There are ups and downs. Sometimes, we walk through swampy areas or on rocky, uncomfortable paths.
At times, we go through seasons of deep challenge and discouragement—literally walking through the valley of the shadow of death due to illness or loss.
Sometimes, we stand at a crossroad, with two paths ahead leading in different directions. These moments come with difficult decisions that can change our lives.

And sometimes, everything feels smooth sailing—like the skies are clear and the sun is shining.

Life is unpredictable. Life is uncertain.
We don’t know what lies ahead.
We don’t know what will happen tomorrow.

But as one song comforts us:
We may not know what tomorrow holds, but we know who holds tomorrow.

Through every season of life, God is guiding us.
He does not want us to remain in the dark.
He guides us with His Word.

“For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword,
it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow;
it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”
(Hebrews 4:12)

God’s Word is the standard in our lives. It does not change.

“All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness,
so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.”
(2 Timothy 3:16–17)

There are four purposes of God’s Word:

  1. Teaching – to instruct us in truth.
  2. Rebuking – to expose our sins so we recognize our wrongs.
  3. Correcting – to show us what is right in God’s eyes.
  4. Training in righteousness – to guide us so that our lives are holy and pleasing to God.

God’s Word teaches and trains us so that we can serve Him effectively.

A Note on Psalm 119:

Psalm 119 is the longest psalm in the Bible. It is an acrostic poem based on the Hebrew alphabet.
It follows the order of the Hebrew letters, starting with Aleph (א) — the first letter — followed by:

  1. Aleph (א) — Verses 1–8
  2. Beth (ב) — Verses 9–16
  3. Gimel (ג) — Verses 17–24
  4. Daleth (ד) — Verses 25–32
    …
  5. Nun (נ) — Verses 105–112

Our focus this morning begins with “Nun,” the 14th section of the psalm.

Each of the eight verses in this section begins with the Hebrew letter Nun (נ) — a beautiful part of the poem’s structure.

“Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.”
(Psalm 119:105)

Psalm 119 is a beautiful love response to God, expressing delight in His Word.
Almost every verse (except a few) refers to God’s Word, law, or commandments.

Among these verses appears a beautiful image: lamp and light.

Lamp vs. Spotlight:

God’s Word is described as a “lamp”—not a spotlight.
It does not shine like a stadium light that illuminates everything at once.

In ancient times, lamps were small clay bowls with oil and a wick. They provided just enough light for one step at a time.

God is telling us:
You don’t need to know the whole picture.
Just trust Him step by step.

“Your word is a lamp to my feet…”
Not a searchlight into the distance, but a gentle glow that shows the next step.

When we go hiking, we want to look at a map to feel safe. But in life, God doesn’t give us a map.
He gives us Himself.
He calls us to trust in Him, not in a plan.

It’s like having a tour guide. We can feel safe and secure knowing He’s leading.

Trusting the Tour Guide:

When we travel, especially to a new place or foreign country, many of us prefer joining a tour group.
We like that everything is planned by the tour guide:
Where we stay, what we eat, where we go.

We just follow the itinerary.
We don’t worry.
We trust the guide.

Sometimes, the tour guide changes the plan due to the weather or other reasons. We may grumble or feel disappointed.
But we trust that the guide knows best — that he knows the location and circumstances well enough to keep us safe.

We feel safe.

We don’t waste time stressing over meals, schedules, or transport.
The guide handles it all — even in emergencies.

We just follow the guide.

Now think about this:
If we can trust a tour guide, a stranger doing his job for profit — why can’t we trust God, our loving Heavenly Father?

Just because we can’t see Him with our physical eyes doesn’t mean He’s not trustworthy.
The tour guide does it for money.
God cares for us out of love.

Conclusion:

God’s grace is sufficient for every step of our journey.
We won’t know all the details or what the future holds.

But we can know the One who holds our future.

We simply need to trust Him and hold His hand—step by step.

God gives us:

  • Daily guidance
  • Daily provision
  • Daily strength

He is with us every step of the way.
He will never forget us.

Spiritual friendships

Richard Foster says that life in God is an onging, ever-changing, relational adventure[1]. When we truly desire a relationship in God, we then move from intention to action in our spiritual life[2]. God wants an active partner in the relationship[3], and this means we are to take action for our part in our relationship with Him. We learn along the way as we grow in relationship with Him.

The Triune God created mankind to carry out His image, including the need for relationship and for community living. We have been created by a relational God for a relationship with Him and with other fellow human beings. Friendship is one of God’s special gifts to humans[4]. Remarkably, “friendship” is one of the terms God used to describe the relationship He desires with us[5]. Friendship with God and with one another is beautiful. We will cheapen the value of friendship God has intended if we reduce it to mere acquaintance[6].

Psychologist Dr Alan Loy McGinnis and his team of colleagues discovered that friendship is the springboard to every other love; that friendships spill over onto the other important relationships of life[7]. The British lay theologian, and writer C.S. Lewis mentioned that spiritual friendships are two persons who care about the same truth. Aristotle also says that friends are ‘a single soul dwelling in two bodies’[8]. Friendships are intimate relationships.

In the olden days, monks would spend their lives living together in the monastery, praying and doing life in the community together. However, in today’s fast-moving world, we have not learned to be a real friend. We have lost the essence of friendship and many have not truly experienced the beauty of friendships. Due to the connected of our modern world, we relocate from cities to cities for jobs or due to marriages and families. The friends we have in children are not necessarily the friends we have in our adulthood. University friends return to their hometowns or move to another country. In our working life, we move from job to job when there is a better offer. Even in the workplace, our relationship with our colleagues and bosses involve little intimacy, trust, commitment and loyalty of real friendships[9]. We mostly want “friends” for business contacts or use “friends” to kill boredom. As geographical areas shrink, we move around so much, and it is becoming harder now than ever to build friendships that are deep.

With the increase of the interest in spirituality (after all, we know that materialism and secularism never truly satisfy us), people are now longing to share their spiritual quests with those who are willing to listen[10].

What are the ideals of spiritual friends?

In our spiritual walk with God, God speaks to us but sometimes it is difficult to tell God’s voice apart with our own inner judgement[11]. That is why we need spiritual friends with whom we can share our insights from our prayers and those who will walk with us in our spiritual walk.  

In our journey as Christians, we should have one or more friendships that support our Christian journey[12]. These are our spiritual friends. Spiritual friends are more than just people bonded over similar hobbies, interests or living in the same community. Spiritual friendship is the calling and depth of a faithful friendship grounded in relationship with God[13]. Spiritual friends are people who nurture the development of each other’s soul so that they can be all that they intend to be[14]. Spiritual friendship is not specialised expertise or professions —they are the gifts of themselves and their companionship on the transforming journey of Christian spirituality[15].

In the Celtic tradition, a spiritual friend, “anam cara” is your companion who carries the truest mirror reflecting the light of your soul[16]. Spiritual friends are bonded in love by God. Friendship with one another and with God is the supreme pleasure of life[17].

Below are the characteristics of spiritual friends:

  • God at the Centre

C.S. Lewis describes friendship as a bond that is deep. He calls it a “kindred soul”. He suggests kindred souls are people who see the same truth and care about the same truth[18]. Friendship involves passion: and this passion is shared in relation to something outside of the friendship. It is an interest of the same thing that puts friends together, be they arts or sports or other areas of interest, if not, there is nothing for the friends to talk about[19]. For spiritual friends, it is the passion for God, His Kingdom and our spiritual walk that put them together.   

The essence of spiritual friendship is that it is leaded by the Holy Spirit to pursue a particular friendship, for instance, in the Bible, there are examples of such friendships between David and Jonathan, Ruth and Naomi, and Paul and Timothy[20]. It is God who put them together to pursue holy intimacy with one another. Consider the loyalty of Ruth to Noami. She was from a foreign background but she cleaved to Naomi, her mother-in-law. Her loyalty has been a source of encouragement to the Israelite community.

Another example is of Jesus and His disciples. Jesus and His disciples shared a deep bond, but their focus point is not on each other. Jesus always pointed them to the will of God the Father, and His kingdom[21]. Their friendship is built around knowing God, loving God and serving God[22].

Friendship involved a bond of love. And this love comes from God. We come with different personalities and characteristics. Yet, it is God’s love that binds us together. Apostle John writes, ‘we love because God loves us’ (1 John 4:19). It is true when it comes to spiritual friendship. Love is an essence that can not be missed.  

One crucial element of a healthy friendship is exclusivity. A healthy spiritual friendship is not just two people sticking to each other, but it is inclusive: it welcomes others to join in and each person bringing out their gifts and personalities to the circle of spiritual friends.

Spiritual friends love each other and see each other through realistic lenses[24]. Love among spiritual friends mean they want to see each other grow to be the person God has intended. Spiritual friends’ love affirms our gifts and want us to develop our gifts to fulfil our potential to be the person God is calling us to be[25]. This is very much different from secular friends who secretly envy of our successes when we are doing well in life.   

  • Honesty and loyalty[26]

Spiritual friends want us to be our full potential for God. They will be honest and speak the truth in love to us. True friends see us realistically: they don’t idolize us, or awestruck by us but they see us as we are. They help us to see our blind spots. But this does not diminish their affection, respect and admiration for us[27]. They remain our friends despite our flaws and weaknesses. Being able to be honest with each other and hold each other to accountable is such a gift. Not everyone is willing to be honest with us and on our part, we are to be humble to receive constructive criticism so that we can continue to grow: spiritually, emotionally, and also intellectually.  

Loyalty means faithfulness to commitment, whether spoken or not[28]. True friends are honest with each other and they preserve confidentiality and commit to be honest to one another. Without honesty and loyalty, there can not be spiritual friendships. 

Spiritual life is ongoing. It is a journey. Because it is a journey, there are bound to be ups and downs. We need spiritual friends to journey with us through the not-so-good-times either. In writing his letters to his friends who were sick, Brother Lawrence assured them that he was praying earnestly for them, that God would give them strength and patience to endure their pain and suffering[30]. Brother Lawrence showed the example of accompaniment as a spiritual friend. He comforted his sick friends who were suffering to know, and continue to knock on God’s door because He would open His mercies to them[31].

Jesus refers to soul as the whole of our being — physical, spiritual, psychological and inner self (Mathew 26:38; Matthew 11:29)[32]. A soul friend, therefore, is a relationship to which I bring my whole self, especially my inner self[33] and vice versa. In soul friendship, I offer care for the other person for her whole self, especially the inner self. This is to safe guard each other’s uniqueness and nurture the growth of each other’s inner self[34]. Soul friends seek to meet each other as whole people and help each other become whole people and offer each other companionship on the human journey[35].  How does Christian spirituality come into picture? Spirituality refers to a person’s awareness of and response to God. Christian spirituality involves working out our existence within the context of our Christian faith and community[36]. God initiates and guides us on our journey and Christian spirituality is our response to the Spirit[37]. 

Although spiritual friends mean friends journeying with us on our spiritual journey, spiritual friends seldom just emphasise on the ‘soul’ of a person. Spiritual friends care for each other as a whole, and not just see each other simply as spiritual beings[38]. Spiritual friendship is not only a gift from God but it is a vocation of love which is to be tended with loyalty and care[39].

What needs to be noted is that the primary relationship of a spiritual friendship is that God is the one who holds the friendship together, it is not just between the friends but it is with God at the centre of the spiritual friendship.

I myself have given and received the gift of spiritual friendships. Where do we find spiritual friends, people who journey with us on our spiritual journey? Surprisingly, they can be found everywhere. They are not just restricted to the people we see in our churches although it is an excellent place to find them. Spiritual friendships can be formed or found in our homes with our family members, at our workplace among our colleagues and in the community which we are living in.

Eucharist as Spiritual Friendship

Luke 22:19-20 teaches us that the Eucharist is the source of Christian friendship which is shared in the Christian community[40]. Eucharist was a sharing of a meal among believers. From the Gospel stories, many wonderful encounters happened when Jesus Christ was eating with His friends. Jesus ate with sinners. He spent time with them. It was at the Passover meal that Jesus called His disciples as His friends, and not servants[41]. It was also at a meal that the disciples of Jesus whom Jesus met on the road to Emmaus recognised Him[42]. Likewise, when we share a meal with our friends, our friendship is renewed and deepened[43]. 

For John Wesley, what binds Eucharist and friendship together is the experience of Presence, which transcends time and space.[44] In Eucharist, we are invited not to only share the bread broken for us, but to share our brokenness; the friendship we share invites us to share not only the wine pour out for us, but to pour our lives as well[45]. At Eucharist, Jesus’ invitation for us to remember that His body broken for us and His blood poured out for us takes on new meaning on what it means to be a friend to one another.   

In sharing the Eucharist, we are reminded that we are one body in Jesus Christ. As His body, we are connected to one another. He has called us friends and therefore we are friends to each other. We are all friends, bound together with love through the sacrifice of Jesus Christ on the Cross. Because of this, there should be sharing of life and pouring of life into one another. We are one: one in Christ, one in each other.  

Home as a place of spiritual friendship

Spiritual friends can also be found in the homes. To our spouse and family members, we have the opportunity to offer each other genuine companionship on our spiritual journey[46]. While parents are to disciple their children (Deuteronomy 6), we can be each others’ spiritual friends as we talk about the work of God in our lives daily and pray together as a family.

Spiritual friendship in Marriage

God created us male and female. There are different roles that the male and the female play at home, as God has intended. God is the One who initiated marriage and bless Adam and Eve with a home and with children. Even in a marriage, spiritual friendship can happen.

Marriage is the most intimate form of human relationships. But no marriage is problem free[47]. Marriage is something God has given to us in our fallen world and marriage is where two flawed people, still struggling with remaining sin, commit to the most extensive and intimate and long-term of all human relationships[48].

Even in a marriage, friendship between the spouses need to be cultivated, and so does spiritual friendship. Spiritual friendship does not happen automatically in a marriage — it needs to be cultivated[49] and nurtured. For the husband and wife to be spiritual friends to one another, a few things are needful:

Respecting our spouse means we see and acknowledge that our spouse is unique and has his/her personality, characteristics, preferences, choices which shape who he/she is—a distinct person. God has a unique plan for our spouse and his/her life. Our spouse is not our possession[51]. They are individuals created by God. God created the man and the woman to be cleaved as one, and this does not mean the fusion of both of them into one: rather, it means the respect of uniqueness and separateness of one another[52]. When we look at our spouse, we are to see the face of God in him/her and the person he/she is in God.  

To be a spiritual friend of our spouse, we are to see him/her through the eyes of God[53]. It is important to be attentive and sensitive to the spiritual journey of our spouse. Spiritual friends mean being attentive to the work of the Spirit in each other’s lives.  Although we live with our spouse, sometimes, the pressure of raising the family takes over. But being married doesn’t mean only sharing parenting or other domestic responsibilities[54]. We should be supportive to each other’s spiritual journey and be sensitive to the movement of God in their life and to play the role of a supporter and prayer partner. The more we pray for our spouse, the more we see him/her through God’s eyes and we will begin to care for her spiritual growth and journey[55].   

Marriage is also a rhythm: talking and quietness, separatedness and togetherness.

Most married couples have nothing much to talk about except the cares of their children and errands to run. Couples can be talking but not listening to the other as they are occupied with the newspapers or programmes on the tv. But being a spiritual friend to our spouse means dialogue: intentionally talking and active listening. It takes discipline to sit face to face with our spouse and to talk, without distractions or children running around in the background. Only when we are actively sharing our experiences and actively listening to the other then do we see the movement of God in his/her life. We do this not out of forced obligation, but we do this because we truly enjoy our spouse’s companionship.

When we engage in genuine dialogue with our spouse, something inside us changes: their experiences become a part of us. My opinions may change, and it changes how I see the world, I see a new facet of my spouse, I have new thoughts and insights about the issues we are exploring and I am more aware of the changes that happen in me[57].  All these keep us accountable in our spiritual journey.

Husband and wife must have regular prayer times and time of worshipping God together as a couple. Yes, it is important to have their own individual and personal quiet time with God to hear from God and to glean from His Word. It is also equally important to spend time together as husband and wife to pray for one another every day, perhaps before bed time. During this time, the couple can share what God is teaching them during the day. The couple should also share how they can pray for the other. This is to keep each other attune to the work of the Spirit in the spouse’s life.

  • Spousal spiritual direction  

Spouses deeply loving one another, deep discussions on life issues and building a genuine friendship lay a solid foundation for a healthy marriage but this does not automatically mean the couple is experiencing soul intimacy[58].  

Besides praying for one another, we can write our spiritual journal and share with our spouse the insights, discoveries and spiritual struggles[59]. From a spiritual retreat in Seven Fountains, Chiang Mai, I have learnt the ‘daily examen’ by St Francis of Loyola, in which we ponder about God’s presence with us during the day. This is something we can share with our spouse before we go to bed.

With the growth of spiritual and retreat centres in Asia, nowadays, it is not hard for a couple to find a spiritual centre with a spiritual director who can guide them in spousal spiritual direction. There are many retreat centres in Malaysia, Singapore, Hong Kong, Thailand and so on. I have seen couples going for retreats together and this not only deepen their individual relationship with God, but also deepen their relationships with one another.

Spiritual Friendship and Community

Methodists are pious in their personal holiness and holding each other to accountability. Methodists gave financially to set up schools for the poor, to buy medication to relieve the sick, build homes for the destitute to take refuge and do all the good they could within their power[60]. They visited the prisoners, cared for the poor and the sick[61]. They were expected to make the visit personally, bringing with them food, money and words of encouragement[62].

God raised up His people to bear His likeness: love, grace, compassion, generosity, forgiveness, peace, to wherever God is sending them. We should love God and love our neighbour.

A central aspect of spiritual formation is becoming like God[63]. Jesus tells His followers that we are to be perfect just as our Heavenly Father is perfect. What does perfection in love means? Surely we can not be perfect as we live in this fallen world. Perfect love simply means: God loves everyone, including those who do not return His love. We as His followers should imitate Him: we are to love others, even our enemies because God loves everyone, including those who are His enemies.

Jesus gave us the Great Commandment. It is not 2 separates commandment, but one. We are to love God and to love others. We can not just love God while ignoring fellow human beings nor do we only love one another and forgetting to obey God and keep His commandments.

Jesus Christ has set us the example in the friendships He had cultivated while He was here on earth. Jesus preached about love in the Sermon on the Mount and Jesus lived it out in His friendships with others. Jesus kept companionship with ordinary men and women: He dined with Zacchaeus, a tax collector; Jesus talked to the woman at the well and Jesus spent time with little children[64]. There were many other examples of friendships Jesus had offered, including to Mary and her siblings Martha and Lazarus.   

Conclusion:

Great men and women of God (Apostle Paul in the New Testament, revivalist John Wesley, godly figures such as Mother Teresa and Brother Lawrence, and modern-day Christian writers such as Henri Nouwen, John Piper, Dietrich Bonhoeffer, and others) had cautioned us, don’t waste our lives away. Our lives are made rich with the presence of God and with spiritual friends.  

Spiritual friendships need to be tended faithfully so that it will grow in healthy and meaningful ways[65]. Most of the time, we are busy with our career, family life and complain that we do not have time for spiritual friendships. For spiritual friendships to grow, we need to cultivate time and invest energy into it. We can either meet on Zoom, or over a weekly breakfast, or meet once a month. Like other spiritual disciplines, it take discipline to establish spiritual friendships. Jesus once again demonstrated that even He, the most busy healer and teacher had enough time to reach out to countless individuals[66]. In these brief moments, they too are spiritual friendships. I think about the many moments when I visited the church members at home or talk to them before or after the church services. These too are moments of spiritual friendships.

What is important is that we have to be aware of God’s movements in our lives. Spiritual friends enrich and bless us in so many ways. And in different seasons in life, we may have different spiritual friends to journey with us. But they all made our life beautiful. May we walk closely and faithfully with God, enjoy Him and enjoy each other as we journey on the path of discipleship until we see Jesus Christ face to face when He calls us home after our journey on earth is completed.

[1] Richard J. Foster, Prayer: Finding the Heart’s True Home (San Francisco: HarperSanFrancisco, 1992), 134.

[2] Foster, Prayer, 134

[3] Ibid.

[4] David G. Benner, Sacred Companions: The Gift of Spiritual Friendship and Direction (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2002), 62.

[5] Benner, Sacred Companions, 62

[6] Ibid.

[7] Alan Loy McGinnis, The Friendship Factor, Minneapolis: (Augsbury Books, 1979), 22.

[8] Parrott and Parrott, Real Relationships, 78

[9] Benner, Sacred Companions, 62

[10] David G. Benner, Sacred Companions, 13  

[11] Christine Valters Paintner, Lectio Divina: The Sacred Art: Transforming Words & Images into Heart Centered Prayer (Woodstock, VT: SkyLight Paths Publishing, 2011).

[12] Benner, Sacred Companions, 14

[13] Stephanie Ford, Kindred Souls: Connection Through Spiritual Friendship, (Nashville: Upper Room Books, 2006), 13

[14] Benner, Sacred Companions, 16

[15] Benner, Sacred Companions, 16

[16] Stephanie Ford, Kindred Souls: Connection Through Spiritual Friendship,14

[17] Drew Hunter, Made for Friendship – The Relationship that Halves our Sorrows and Doubles Our Joys, (IL: Crossway, 2018), 17.

[18] Benner, Sacred Companions, 66

[19] Benner, Sacred Companions, 66

[20] Stephanie Ford, Kindred Souls: Connection Through Spiritual Friendship, 15

[21] Benner, Sacred Companions, 67

[22] Ibid.

[23] Benner, Sacred Companions, 65

[24] Benner, Sacred Companions, 68

[25] Ibid.

[26] Benner, Sacred Companions, 65

[27] Benner, Sacred Companions, 68

[28] Benner, Sacred Companions, 69

[29] Benner, Sacred Companions, 65

[30] Brother Lawrence and Harold Myra, The Practice of the Presence of God: Experience the Spiritual Classic through 40 Days of Daily Devotion (Our Daily Bread Publishing, 2017), 94.

[31] Brother Lawrence and Harold Myra, The Practice of the Presence of God: Experience the Spiritual Classic through 40 Days of Daily Devotion, 94

[32] Benner, Sacred Companions, 15

[33] Benner, Sacred Companions, 15

[34] Benner, Sacred Companions, 15

[35] Benner, Sacred Companions, 15

[36] Benner, Sacred Companions, 15

[37] Ibid.

[38] Benner, Sacred Companions, 16

[39] Ford, Kindred Souls: Connection Through Spiritual Friendship, 15

[40] Ripple, Called to Be Friends (Indiana: Ave Maria Press, 1980), 151

[41] Ripple, Called to Be Friends, 151

[42] Ripple, Called to Be Friends, 151

[43] Ripple, Called to Be Friends, 151

[44] Ripple, Called to Be Friends, 151

[45] Ripple, Called to Be Friends ,158

[46] Benner, Sacred Companions, 197

[47] Paul David Tripp, Marriage: 6 Gospel Commitments Every Couple Needs to Make (Wheaton, IL: Crossway,

     2021)

[48] Tripp, Marriage: 6 Gospel Commitments Every Couple Needs to Make.

[49] Benner, Sacred Companions, 186

[50] Benner, Sacred Companions, 186

[51] Benner, Sacred Companions, 187

[52] Benner, Sacred Companions, 187

[53] Benner, Sacred Companions, 188

[54] Benner, Sacred Companions, 188

[55] Benner, Sacred Companions,189

[56] Benner, Sacred Companions, 188

[57] Benner, Sacred Companions, 192

[58] Benner, Sacred Companions, 199

[59] Benner, Sacred Companions, 201

[60] Rev. Ivan Tan, “The People Called Methodists,”

[61] Rev. Ivan Tan, “The People Called Methodists,” Asbury Seminary E‑link, November 2, 2012, accessed September 4, 2025, https://asburyseminary.edu/elink/the-people-called-methodists/

[62] Rev. Ivan Tan, “The People Called Methodists,” Asbury Seminary E‑link, November 2, 2012, accessed September 4, 2025, https://asburyseminary.edu/elink/the-people-called-methodists/

[63] Oord, Spiritual Formation, 68

[64] Ford, Kindred Souls: Connection Through Spiritual Friendship, 18

[65] Ford, Kindred Souls: Connection Through Spiritual Friendship, 99

[66] Ford, Kindred Souls: Connection Through Spiritual Friendship, 101

Bibliogpraphy:

Books

Benner, David G. Sacred Companions: The Gift of Spiritual Friendship and Direction. Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2002.

Edwards, Tilden. Spiritual Director, Spiritual Companion: Guide to Tending the Soul. Mahwah, NJ: Paulist Press, 2001.

Keller, Timothy, and Kathy Keller. The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God. New York: Dutton, 2011.

Kempis, Thomas à. The Imitation of Christ. Peabody, MA: Hendrickson Publisher Marketing, LLC, 2004.

Kolodiejchuk, Brian, ed. Mother Teresa: Come Be My Light: The Private Writings of the Saint of Calcutta. New York: Doubleday, 2007.

Lawrence, Brother, and Harold Myra. The Practice of the Presence of God: Experience the Spiritual Classic through 40 Days of Daily Devotion. Our Daily Bread Publishing, 2017.

Malony, H. Newton. The Amazing John Wesley: An Unusual Look at an Uncommon Life. Downers Grove, IL: IVP Books, 2010.

McGinnis, Alan Loy. The Friendship Factor. Minneapolis, MN: Augsburg Books, 1979.

Merton, Thomas. Spiritual Direction and Meditation. Collegeville, MN: Liturgical Press, 2013.

Nouwen, Henri J. M. Spiritual Formation: Following the Movements of the Spirit. With Michael J. Christensen and Rebecca J. Laird. 1st ed. New York: HarperOne, 2010.

Oord, Thomas Jay. Spiritual Formation. Kansas City, MO: Nazarene Publishing House, n.d.

Oden, Thomas C. The Gifts of the Spirit. Nashville, TN: Abingdon Press, 1994.

Oden, Thomas C. The Teachings of John Wesley. Vol. 4. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2014.

Palmer, Parker J. Let Your Life Speak: Listening for the Voice of Vocation. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2000.

Parrott, Les, and Leslie Parrott. Real Relationships. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2011.

Piper, John. Don’t Waste Your Life. Wheaton, IL: Crossway, 2003.

Southey, Robert. The Life of Wesley; and the Rise and Progress of Methodism. 2 vols. London: Longman, Hurst, Rees, Orme, and Brown, 1820.

St. John of the Cross. “Dark Night: Prologue.” In Dark Night of the Soul. Christian Classics Ethereal Library. Accessed September 4, 2025. https://www.ccel.org/ccel/john_cross/dark_night.vi.html

Tan, Ivan. “The People Called Methodists.” Asbury Seminary E‑link. November 2, 2012. Accessed September 4, 2025. https://asburyseminary.edu/elink/the-people-called-methodists/.

Tripp, Paul David. Marriage: 6 Gospel Commitments Every Couple Needs to Make. Wheaton, IL: Crossway, 2021.

God’s Word is unchanging

I am preparing a wedding sermon for this coming Saturday morning.


I the past, I felt inadequate doing pre-marital counselling and preaching at weddings because I am single – – – I felt I had no life experiences to share with the couple regarding marital issues.


When I was sharing this frustration with someone, this person adviced me to share from God’s Word because God’s Word never changes. I do not need to feel inadequate if I am preaching God’s word and exhort them using biblical principles.

God’s Word does not sway to and fro basing on cultures, ideas or the latest trends. We can rely on God’s Word as our spiritual compass and direction in life.

God’s unchanging Word also reminds us of His nature: that He is faithful, eternal, consistent and trustworthy. 💕

How do you relate to God,  knowing that He and His Word and promises are unchanging?

Growing in the grace and knowledge of Jesus Christ

Our Christian faith is not about standing still at where we are. It’s about growing: growing deeper in grace, richer in knowledge, and closer to Jesus Christ day by day.
Growth takes time. Spirituality is a journey. Step by step, we walk with Jesus. We learn more about Him and find delight in His presence each day.
May God lead us and guide us to know Him more.

Questions for reflection:

  1. What does “growing in grace” look like in your life right now?
  2. How are you actively seeking to know Jesus more deeply?
  3. What areas of your life are you still rely on your strength instead of His grace?
  4. Is there something which is keeping you from growing in your faith?
  5. How can you let God shape your heart daily?

Trusting in God for He cares for us

Psalm 13

For the director of music. A psalm of David.

1 How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?

    How long will you hide your face from me?

2 How long must I wrestle with my thoughts

    and day after day have sorrow in my heart?

    How long will my enemy triumph over me?

3 Look on me and answer, Lord my God.

    Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death,

4 and my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,”

    and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

5 But I trust in your unfailing love;

    my heart rejoices in your salvation.

6 I will sing the Lord’s praise,

    for he has been good to me.

If you can ask God any question, what would you ask Him? There are many things going on in the news. The things we read make us worried, make us fearful and make us lose hope in the human race and make us reflect on our own lives.

One of the most common question people ask about God is: “why does God allow suffering if He is good?”

Barna‑style survey reported via Christian Today Australia reveals that in a national survey, the top question people wanted to ask God was “Why He allows pain and suffering in this world?”

Apologetic literature, Lifeway Research lists “If God is good, why is there suffering?” as one of the most frequently asked questions by non‑believers.

According to Issues in Perspective, the #1 most‑Googled question in America about God is “Who created God?”, closely followed by “Why does God allow suffering?”

Even as Christians, this is the question we want to ask God too. Why are there tragedies if God is good? Why is He turning His face away? Why God allows evil if He is holy?

The psalmist also wrestles with this question. He experienced moments when he felt God was so far away from him. That he feels that God has abandoned him. Being abandoned and forsaken is not a good feeling. And sometimes being a human means at times in our lives God seems so far away. We feel we are in a pit with problems and difficulties without the success and blessings from God. We pray but our prayers do not seem to reach God’s ears.  

There are 3 parts in this psalm (Complaints to God/Ask God for help/Praise God)

  • Lament / Complaint (Verses 1–2)

Have you ever felt that God is so far away? How can He be a personal God when He seems so far?

Have you felt God is not listening to your prayers? You have been praying and praying and it seems that God is not listening. Nothing is happening. 

Have you felt God has forgotten about you? At one point or another in our life, we experienced so.

People in Thailand and Cambodia. Majority of them do not know God but so do. They are now living in fear because of the war that is going on in their countries. Surely they cried out to God or any powers they know for relief and for help.

People are living in worry in countries that may be affected by tsunami after the 8.8 earthquake in Russia. Where is God?

The psalmist David expresses that he feels God has abandoned him. He feels God has not even heard his prayers. And he is emotionally stressed and sad because God has seemingly forgotten about him.

“How long, O LORD?” is repeated four times in these 2 verses. He is desperately crying out to God for relief. He is in despair. He must have been waiting and waiting upon God for help but God is not there to rescue him, so he is holding on.  

And this is his complaint to God.  

Christians have a misconception that we have to use our words carefully and only show our good side to God. But as the psalmist has shown us, we can bring all our emotions to God, even emotions such as:

-frustration

-anger

-sadness

-despair

-hopelessness

-helplessness

-worried

-feeling defeated

We can bring all these to God. God already knows everything. He wants us to be honest with Him and tell Him how we feel, even if He seems so far away.

God loves us. Before we know who He is, He has sent His only Son Jesus to die for us, so that we can be reconciled with Him and be His children. He does not want us to be separated from Him.   

There is nothing about us that is shocking to God. Nowadays with social media, we have been wired to put only the good side of us for everyone to see. Sometimes the things we post on social media is not the real us but we just want to tell others how good we are or how we have everything in life in control. We don’t want to appear weak or failing in life. It is easy to pretend to be someone we are not in our social media.

A friend of mine went traveling a couple of weeks ago. She posted really nice photos of her trip. When she came back, we met up, she admitted that the tourist spot is not what it seems. It is easy to look perfect for the camera and hide our insecurities.

But not with God. God knows what we are going through. He sees what we are going through. He wants our honesty as we come before Him. It is a comfort to know we can come to Him just as we are.

David is being transparent with God, asking God not to hide anymore. He has been ruminating, his mind goes on and on and repeat itself, he is wrestling with his mind. And his enemy is triumphant. It is like pouring vinegar over his wound.  

I read somewhere that God’s love is like the sun. Like the sun it is always there, sometimes the cloud will hide the sun, but we know the sun is there giving us sunlight. We don’t always see God but He is there.

  • Petition / Prayer for Help (Verses 3–4)

3 Look on me and answer, Lord my God.

    Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death,

4 and my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,”

    and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

David prays that God will respond and intervene in his situation. He requests for God to “Look,” “Answer,” and “Give light to my eyes.”

David asks God to enlighten his eyes, it can be asking God to give him understanding. It can also mean that David asking God’s presence to be with him through the long journey of night, and through the valley of fear and tears.

 He loves God. He knows God is almighty. That is why to him, it does not make sense if enemies do not see God’s great power. How ridiculous it is when enemies have victory over the Almighty and everlasting God.

I have chronic dizziness. I have a lot of friends who do not yet know God. I am the first pastor they know. I pray to God, You are powerful, You are everlasting, You are God the healer and why won’t You heal me so that those who do not know you will know You are a Great God? 

  • Trust and Praise (Verses 5–6)

5 But I trust in your unfailing love;

    my heart rejoices in your salvation.

6 I will sing the Lord’s praise,

    for he has been good to me.

Despite feeling that God is so far away and having enemies around him, feeling despaired, the psalmist still trusts in God. He does not understand the circumstances around him, yet he know for sure that God’s love is unfailing. Despite being surrounded and defeated by the enemies, he knows for sure and without fail, that God will come to rescue him. He knows that God will save him from the enemies.

Why? Because he trusts in God. He is a friend of God. How do we be friends of God? By spending time with Him. That is how we get to know someone, by spending time with that person. David spends time with God, in prayers in worshipping God, in being genuine before God, no pretense.

That is why we see his shift: from hopelessness to hope. From despair to confidence.

Yes, terrible things are happening to him. Yes, he faces dangers and enemies are around him but he will still sing the Lord’s praise. He can still say God is good because he counts his blessings. May be sometimes we think God has to answer us in a certain way. But if we count our blessings, we know He is always here with us.

Praise is very important. When we sing praises to God, it will shift our focus from our human perspective and limitation to God’s eternal perspective and His infinite wisdom.

“6 I will sing the Lord’s praise,

    for he has been good to me.”

Do you praise God even when it is hard?

No one live a smooth sailing life. Even men and women of God who love God are not exempted from the challenges of this world. Even men and women of God also experienced sickness, discouragement and depression. What did God say to them? “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” — 2 Corinthians 12:9 (NIV)

It is when we are weak, then we lean upon His power, His grace and mercy. When we are weak, we are strong through Jesus Christ.

In 2003, there is a 13-year-old rising surf star in Hawaii. Her name is Bethany Hamilton. She is a Christian. One morning, she went out for a surf with friends. It was just another beautiful day—until a 14-foot tiger shark attacked her, biting off her entire left arm.

Her life was forever changed.

Many people thought that her surfing career was over. If that happened to you, would you be angry at God? Imagine the fear, the pain, and the question: “God, why would You let this happen? I was using my talent for You!”

But Bethany had strong faith in God. She didn’t let this accident shake her faith and believe in God. She didn’t leave her Christian faith because of this accident. She didn’t forsake God when she lost her arm. With God’s strength, she returned to surfing just one month later, learning to surf with one arm. Imaging being so skillful at something but suddenly you have to relearn everything from scratch. It was not easy.

Despite having to relearn surfing with one hand, she did not give up. She went on to win national titles and became an inspiration to millions—not just because she surfed again, but because of how boldly she trusted God through it all.

She once said: “I don’t need easy. I just need possible—with God.”

Today, she shared her testimony and speak about Jesus and resilience. She showed the world that hope is stronger than fear, and faith is bigger than tragedy.

Some of us might not have lost a limb, but we’ve lost dreams, opportunities, or people we love. Life’s waves hit us hard. Bethany’s story reminds us: God doesn’t promise a life free of pain—but He does promise to walk with us through it. And when we trust Him, even the most broken part of our story can become the most powerful testimony.

Psalm 23:4 is a promise we can hold onto during tough moments: “Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me.”

Whatever your circumstances in life are, trust in God. You may not see hope. You may not see light, but He is with you. Hope will come because He is the God who gives hope. Light will come because He is the light of the world.  

Conclusion:

We don’t live in a perfect world. Some things never make sense on this side. But this is when we have to fully trust in God. Trust that He knows and His ways are almighty and perfect. Trust that He cares for us.

We don’t have to know all the answers. Sometimes, it is not for us to know. God is our Creator. He does not owe us any explanations. He does not have to tell us what. What we are to do is to trust in Him.

From lament, to praise, we praise God because of Who God is. He is merciful and great. He is faithful and He loves us.

Enjoy the meal, not the wrapper

Jeremiah 29:11, ’11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’

This evening, while locking the door of my house to go out, my dog took a food wrapper, thinking it was food. There was no food inside the wrapper.
We would be giving him a delicious. He wouldn’t have to eat a piece of plastic, it wasnt edible.

Seeing him chewing on the wrapper reminded me of myself. Oftentimes I am like this too. God, my Heavenly Father has great plans for me and yet I am stubborn, holding on to something flimsy and refusing to let go and trust in His plan. God is sovereign & almighty. His thoughts and plans for me are the best. They are for my good.

Just as I would not give my dog a wrapper to eat but I would  give him a delicious meal I know he would enjoy because I love him, God has  the best plans for me too because He loves me. I just have to let go of the ‘wrapper’ and trust in Him.

Enjoy the meal, not a plastic wrapper.

Soar on Wings Like Eagle

An encouragement for the month of July:

The word “hope” (*qāwâ* in Hebrew) here is an active, expectant trust. It means, anchoring yourself in God’s faithfulness despite challenges in life. 

God “…will renew their (your) strength.” God will replace your weariness with His power.

You “will soar on wings like eagles…”.
Eagles ride thermal winds effortlessly.  Likewise, God lifts you up above the circumstances in your life, giving you peace and victory.

You will “…run and not grow weary… Walk and not faint”. God sustains you with endurance and His strength in your everyday life.

#eagleswings